Thursday, December 6, 2018

Threats, Lies & Gas Lighting


Back in May, I posted a Blog entry which discussed the topic of revenge porn and what you should do if someone threatens you with that crime. My goal was to help others who may find themselves in the same horrible situation. Not only is the threat of revenge porn illegal, it is also traumatic to the victim. The Blog entry was well received however, I deleted the post at the request of the man who threatened me. You may be asking yourself why I would do that, particularly since I went to the police and filed a report against him (he received a phone call from the cops). The man begged me and my father for forgiveness and asked me for a second chance. After turning to my Christian teachings, I decided to give him another shot. Happiness lasted two weeks before the lies, cheating, gas lighting and threats happened all over again. 




For those who follow me on social media, you are aware that I created a Go Fund Me to help replace my property that my ex refused to return. He stated he was going to set part of my property (my beloved doll collection) on fire. What can I say; cheaters don't like being caught (again) and immediately resort to threats. Text messages with dates and time stamps are a wonderful thing, when you have to provide proof, aren't they? And hey, after being screamed at, cheated on, lied to, attempting to gas light me to my own family, why not throw a cherry on top by threatening me one last time with a crime? 



I want to start by reposting information that provides help for those who may be threatened with revenge porn. What is revenge porn? See below: 


"Revenge porn or revenge pornography is the distribution of sexually explicit images or video of individuals without their permission. The sexually explicit images or video may be made by a partner of an intimate relationship with the knowledge and consent of the subject, or it may be made without his or her knowledge." ~Wikipedia


To view a listing of revenge porn laws in the United States including fines and jail time, follow this LINK and click on your state. I  advise that you go to the police and file a report. Take any evidence with you such as voice mails or text messages. I strongly suggest blocking your abuser. I blocked mine however, he found a way to contact me using another persons account and the manipulative cycle started all over again. I recommend that you visit the website 50 Shades of Silence. It is a global movement giving a voice and support to those who are victims of online crimes. We are all aware of the definition of liars and cheaters, but what exactly is gas lighting?



"Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that seeks to sow seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or in members of a targeted group, making them question their own memory, perception, and sanity. Using persistent denial, misdirection, contradiction, and lying, it attempts to destabilize the victim and delegitimize the victim's belief ." ~Wikipedia


Examples of this are finding late night flirtatious messages your then-boyfriend sent to several women via Facebook and him scream at you that its "nothing" (or it didn't happen even though you found the messages and you took screen caps before he deleted it) and you are being "immature", then accusing you of being a cheater, with no evidence whatsoever. Or him telling your family that he dumped you and you can't accept it however, you have voicemails and text messages where he is stating you aren't broken up, he loves you, you are still a couple and it's your family that is trying to turn you against him.  Or how about your ex demanding you tell him you love him, says he won't leave you alone until you confess you are still in love with him, sends you pictures of the two of you together, he professes his undying love for you and wants you back, and you discover he's doing it from his secret new girlfriends house.

This article lists signs of gas lighting and why abusers practice this disgusting trait. I felt sick to my stomach reading it, as it is 110% accurate. Read it HERE



Being in a toxic relationship can leave many mental and emotional scars. This first thing I would like to say to anyone who has had the misfortune of experiencing this is, it is not your fault.  You did not deserve any of this. Sadly some people are rotten to the core. It does not matter how long you have known them, how much you loved them, how hard you tried to help them or how much faith, trust  and prayer you put into them. They will always let you down because quite frankly, they are literally a piece of shit. It is important when I say you must cut toxic people from your life. If you don't, they will continue to abuse you until the day you die. Some people are okay with that and despite the horrendous things done to them, despite their abuser literally ruining their life, they will still go around saying so-and-so is still a "good person”. Don't be that fool. Don't be that punching bag. You will lose yourself and your sanity. GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN. You cannot be friends with a person like this. You will leave the relationship changed and somewhat damaged but you will heal and you will be victorious. Your abuser will continue to rot from the very pit of their soul as they jump from bed to bed, wrapped in lies. You will rise; they will fall.





7 Cups is a free online service where you can chat with trained counselors. If you are feeling suicidal from all of the abuse you endured, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline:
1-800-273-8255


I wish you every happiness. You deserve it.



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Contact Me:

Email: victoria.avalor@gmail.com





Sunday, October 7, 2018

In Memoriam: Callie Cosplay 1991-2018


On October 5th 2018, Debra Burroughs, the mother of Callie Cosplay, took to Facebook to announce that her daughter had passed away. Callie was survived by her mother and brother. Her father died in 2017. The shocking news quickly spread throughout the cosplay community that we had lost one of our brightest stars. In addition to being a talented cosplayer and model, Callie was also a musician, a photographer, writer and gamer. She was well known for her kindness and was never too busy to make time for her friends or her fans. 

Sunday, September 23, 2018

Snow White Gallery For Hispanic Heritage Month


September 15th-October 15th is Hispanic Heritage Month. For those who do not know, I am of Hispanic descent. My grandparents immigrated to the United States from the island of Puerto Rico. 5 years ago I made a decision in cosplay that terrified me; my next costume would be Snow White, the notorious ivory skinned princess. Being a Latina, I have encountered racism not only in everyday life, but in cosplay as well. I have been told that certain characters I portrayed were inaccurate or poorly done because my "skin color clashed with the costume." It took me a very long time to have the courage to put together a Snow White cosplay. I finally decided not to listen to the racists; if I wanted to be my favorite Grimm fairy tale character, then I was going to do it. Cosplay knows no limits. We are not held hostage by cosplay because of the color of our skin. It is meant to be enjoyed by all. 

Saturday, July 21, 2018

Teen Titans Go To The Movies Advance Review



On July 21, 2018 I attended an advance screening for Teen Titans Go To The Movies. The film will be released nationwide July 27th. It has a run time of 1 hour and 32 minutes and is rated PG. 

Robin is frustrated with not being taken seriously as a super hero. He longs to have the same respect and movie franchise as Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman. He convinces the Titans to embark on a journey to Hollywood to approach Jade Wilson, the number one super hero film director in the world . He tries to convince her to make a movie about the Titans. When the director declines, the Titans go on a quest to travel back in time to “rescue” the other heroes from their tragic origins, thus eliminating the competition. If there are no other heroes other than the Titans, Hollywood has no choice but to make a movie about them, right? What could possibly go wrong?




The film is filled with an endless supply of Easter eggs that DC comic and movie fans will greatly enjoy. In a surprising move, there are also several references to Marvel Comics and even a cameo by someone from the Marvel Universe. The movie is very much indeed a comedy with many laugh out loud moments. Different animated sequences grace the screen including a Disney like segment and the triumphant return of Batman: The Animated Series. The movie begins with an animated short of the revamped DC Super Hero Girls featuring Batgirl, Wonder Woman, Zatanna, Supergirl, Green Lantern and Bumble Bee. It was very entertaining! The movie has a surprising end credit scene so stay in your seat! 



Teen Titans Go To The Movies is great fun! The comedy appeals to everyone but particularly to hardcore DC fans. I took my 10 year old brother to the screening and we both loved it and had a great time. I give this movie 2 thumbs up! 


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Contact Me

Twitter and Instagram: @victoria_avalor

Email: victoria.avalor@gmail.com

Friday, July 20, 2018

Cycle 2 Print Shop!



Esmeralda Autographed 8x10
$20





Justice League Dark Zatanna Autographed 8x10
$20





Mystique Autographed 8x10
$20





Sun Dress Autographed 8x10
$20




Esmeralda #2 Autographed 8x10
$20





Huntress Autographed 8x10
$20


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Shipping to U.S. Only. Price includes shipping. Send payment via PayPal as friend or family member to: cosplay.girl@yahoo.com
You will receive a confirmation email once payment is processed. Thank you! 




Sunday, July 15, 2018

Cycle 1 Print Shop!



Autographed Nurse Harley Quinn 8x10 
$20






Autographed Belle 8x10
$20




Autographed Boba Fett and Leia 8x10
$20




Autographed Gal Gadot Wonder Woman 8x10
$20





Autographed Moana 8x10
$20






Autographed Zatanna 8x10
$20






 Autographed Princess Jasmine 8x10
$20





Autographed Supergirl 8x10
$20



New 52 Wonder Woman 8x10
$20



Shipping within the U.S. Only. Send your payment as friend or family member via PayPal to: cosplay.girl@yahoo.com along with the title of the print you wish to purchase. You will receive a confirmation email once your payment is processed.

Thank you!